A friend of mine recently lost her job and now faces an uncertain economic future. I have a friend who has decided to courageously fight and overcome an obstacle that has plagued her for years. Another friend has spent weeks in a hospital at her mom's side, rotating shifts with exhausted family members, balancing the needs of her family with the needs of her mother, not knowing each time she leaves to care for her three children, if it will be the last time she sees her mom alive. My grandmother speaks wistfully of a desire to return to her home, leaving the assisted living facility where she now resides, knowing that her longing will most likely never be fulfilled. My cousin missed her daughter's college graduation to rush to her father's side as he fought for his life in a hospital. Today, a dear friend, who had just comforted neighbors who lost their son to suicide, learned that her best friend lost her young daughter in a drowning. I don't know her friend, but because the experience of motherhood is universal, I wept for her loss because no friend cries alone, no family member cries alone, no mother cries alone.
The pain of life is palpable and its taste is bitter. The pit of despondence is deep and the surprise with which the enemy attacks is overwhelming. Life sometimes spirals out of control, and there are no words, no neatly spoken platitudes than can fix real hurt, real despair, real pain. How do you comfort a mother who just lost her child? How do you help the friend whose best friend just lost her baby? How do you choose between a sick parent and graduating daughter? In this world, children are sold to brothels for a lifetime of slavery when they should be skipping carelessly through their backyard, dreaming of bright futures. Parents drop their children off at orphanages in a desperate attempt to secure adequate food and shelter. Millions long for a simple cup of clean water, water that won't leave their children ravaged by disease, fighting for their lives. Orphans long for a forever family. Men and women kill and maim in the name of God. Earthquakes, floods, and fires ravage and devastate, leaving families destitute and wondering why, how, what now?
Life spirals, the world spins, leaving a wake of confusion. We hurl our questions to heaven with an ache that leaves us breathless. Why? We fall to our knees as tears pour into our open palms and we ask, "How?" The heart-shattering moan of a mother who rocks back and forth unable to be comforted by the loving arms of those who long desperately to ease the pain, if only for a moment, echoes throughout the house, the world, reaching the ears of One who can. What now? Sometimes its more than we can bear because tragedy is ruthless and relentless. There are moments it seems the world is spinning off its axis into an abyss of despair, and if we're not careful we can get sucked into the lie that there is no hope. But despite loss, despite the dark cloud of desperation that blocks out the light of hope, it's still there; even when we can't see with our eyes, He is there.
We question, we doubt, we wonder, we cling. We cling desperately to the truth that though in this life we face trouble, Jesus has overcome the world. We grasp hold of faith tightly with both hands as if our lives depend on it. Faith doesn't mean we have the answers; it doesn't mean we understand, it means we trust the One who does. It means we continue to wrestle even when life doesn't make sense. As my mind raced in church this morning while I prayed for a way to comfort my friends, the Holy Spirit kept bringing me back to Luke 22, where Jesus, who knew from the beginning what must come to pass, wrestled with His mission. "Father, if you are willing take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.....And being in anguish he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground." God reminded me that Jesus isn't someone who can't relate to our pain. He came as flesh and blood; he experienced every aspect of life. He faced moments of joy, delight, but at times, He was so full of despair and anguish that He sweat blood, while praying to the God He had seen face-to-face to spare the pain of death. Yet, because of Christ's willingness to take on the sin of the world, we have hope; anyone willing to reach out and accept Him in faith has hope. Your Savior knows the sorrow of feeling abandoned and forsaken, "My Lord, my Lord, why have You forsaken Me?" Jesus, as human, called out, "Why?" He asked, he wrestled to the point of bleeding, yet He continued. Why? How? What now?
When life heaves a blow I think I can't bear; I hesitate to question because I fear God. He is holy and mighty and who are we to question Him? Yet, He allows the questions.; Psalm is full of questions; scripture is full of men and women who struggled with doubt. I think the questioning is what builds intimacy in our relationship with Jesus. When Lazarus died, Mary didn't shrug when she met Jesus and say, "Well, I guess it was God's will, and I will accept it in silence." No, she ran to Jesus and said, I believe, in a somewhat accusatory tone, "If you had been here my brother would not have died." In her grief, she honestly told Jesus what was on her heart, and knowing that He was about to bring Lazarus back from the dead, Jesus was so moved by Mary and Martha's grief that He wept. He didn't become angered by her audacity; He comforted her. Jesus shared in their grief just as He shares in the grief and anxiety of my friends. Even though we don't understand the reason for suffering, we can cling to Jesus, who even though He knows the answers to our questions, doesn't lecture us with explanations, he shares in our grief. He doesn't hit us over the head with theology; He weeps alongside us. He doesn't trivialize our pain, He bears it with us. Why, how, what now?
Isn't it strange how it often takes death to put life into perspective? After my friend shared what had happened to her friend, my first instinct was to run to my two children, gather them into my arms, and never let them go. All through church, my mind raced with promises to never take for granted those little moments, to extend extra grace, to err on the side of mercy, to call my grandmother everyday, to work less, love more, never turn away those little arms when they reach up for a hug or beg for one more book. It's tragedy that often shakes us back to the reality of what matters. Because it's not a matter of if, it is a matter of when. When loss, stress, and despair knock us off our feet, the fire of it all refines our focus. I left church with the questions: why? how? what now? I left with the lingering thought, "What if I lived everyday with the perspective that tragedy brings?" What if I lived in the moment, focused on the present? What if I stopped trying to figure out the "right thing to say" and just grieved with my friends? While tragedy is wretched, it offers an opportunity to "bear one another's burdens." It gives us an opportunity to look beyond our own pain to see the pain of others. We live in a world filled with tragedy and pain, yet we also are filled with Hope, and Hope is a person, Jesus. Tragedy allows us to share that Hope with others and help provide healing to a broken world.
To my dear friends who can't see through the cloud, know that Jesus loves you, that your church loves you, and that I love you. "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned the flames will not set you ablaze. For I am the Lord your God.....Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you....Do not be afraid for I am with you." Isaiah 43.
"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne. Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands." Isaiah 49
"The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; his mercies are new every morning." Lamentations 3:22-23
Showing posts with label Christ. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christ. Show all posts
Sunday, August 11, 2013
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Rejoicing in Weakness
I don't like to ask for help. There, I said it. It's an admission of weakness that makes me seem, well, weak. I'm the Mighty Mouse of moms. Here I come to save the day! You need help. I've got you covered. No, really, I've got this. I don't need help. Nope. I'm going to work harder, longer, and more efficiently. Really, I've got this.
So, this may come as a complete shock to those who know me best, but I have a difficult time saying no. Don't roll your eyes. You do it, too. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure eye rolling is the first sign of conviction from the Holy Spirit. The next one is clearly denial, so don't go there. Perhaps this scenario seems familiar. You're in the middle of planning lessons while making dinner when the phone rings. Because you, like me, believe somehow the caller will see you're ignoring the call and take offense to your refusal to answer, you dig through your purse frantically searching for your phone, which is set on the "bark" ring tone thanks to children with a sense of humor and snatch it from the depths of the unknown just in time. Your husband hears this one-sided part of the conversation. "Saturday? Sure, I've got time to teach an extra class. Cookies? Homemade? Sure. Host a dinner afterwards? Of course, I'll just run the vacuum." In the meantime, both of your children can't live without immediate attention. Apparently, the blue crayon is AWOL and you're the only one who can find it. You hang up the phone, checking three times to make sure the call has ended, so the caller doesn't hear you and/or your husband and/or your children scream. You smile sheepishly, shrug your shoulders, and sigh, "I'll manage. It's no big deal," pull the burned rolls from the oven, disable the fire alarm, then go to your room and cry.
Not that I speak from experience, but the next thing you know you're driving down the highway suddenly bawling, turning up Adventures In Odyssey, so your children don't notice, drop them off at your husband's office, late, so you can make a doctor's appointment, late. Two hours later, you're covered in a thin papery-gown, freezing and sobbing, while the nurse pats your back and your doctor writes a prescription for anti-depressants. I've heard rumors of breakdowns like this happening, just saying....
And, here's the funny part, I....I mean, you, aren't fooling anyone. I have a friend who can take one look at me and sense immediately that I've over scheduled myself into a frenzy, however well-meaning my intentions. It seems my wild-eyed pacing, extreme frustration, and strange mumbling are dead giveaways that I clearly need a hand yet refuse to ask for one. I come by it honestly. I grew up in a family of self-sufficient do-it-yourselfers. I remember my mom pulling a week of all-nighters sewing burgundy taffeta, so my sister and I would have new dresses for a pageant. My sisters selflessly volunteer their time despite having a laundry list of demands at home. Like the mighty Titanic, we think we're unsinkable until we hit an iceberg and discover it's a little late.
We're not alone. I witness daily mom after mom buying into the lie that we can have it all that if we work harder or longer; we can single-handedly conquer whatever the day may throw at us. We believe the enemy when he whispers into our ear that our inability to accomplish every task on our to-do list is a sign of our incompetence and weakness. We refuse to admit that we're weak, frail, and human; that we're not supermom. Our inability to say no is the mask we wear to hide our weaknesses. We lose sight of grace and continue working our fingers to the bone for a salvation that can't be accomplished by works.
Recently, God opened my eyes anew to Paul's own breakdown moment. While he may not be supermom, he is the Mighty Mouse of Jesus followers. I realize most of us aren't sitting imprisoned for sharing our faith in Christ, but life can be tough, and in our vain human pride, we often make it even harder. Paul didn't hide behind his difficulty. "We do not want you to be uninformed brothers and sisters about the troubles we experienced...we were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves, but on God, who raises the dead...on Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us, as you help by your prayers." 2 Cor 1: 8-11. Again, while none of us are necessarily facing death, we face our own trials, and what struck me about Paul's response is that he didn't pretend everything was okay. He's saying, straight up, we were scared for our lives.
Paul, super-apostle, man who'd encountered the risen Christ on the road to Damascus was stressed. He admitted it and pleaded for prayer. He reached out to his brothers and sisters in Christ, many facing the same thing he was, and asked for help through prayer. How many of us are in this mommying, serving, following Christ thing together? Why are we so stoic? Why are we pretending to be strong? Is it an attempt to prove we're better than everyone else? Girls, what do we gain by attempting to do it all and have it all? Why do we beat each other up, look down our nose at each other's choices and sit on a lonely throne of self-righteousness? Is a failure to admit weakness strength? No. Paul tells us so a little later in Corinthians. Are we denying each other an opportunity to minster and to pray and to share in each other's hardships? Isn't this one of our callings as sisters in Christ? Have I broken a record for most questions in one paragraph? We are called to support and love each other and by soldiering on in solitude, slowly crumbling under the pressures of life, building flimsy walls that block out the world from knowing how exhausted and overwhelmed we truly are, we deny each other our calling.
Paul also realized that God had allowed this to happen to increase his dependence on Jesus. He, later in the same book expresses a similar theme: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Cor 12:9-10. Come again? Did you hear that? He delighted in his weakness. In his weakness lay his strength. Not only do we deny our friends and family the opportunity to fulfill their callings in Christ, we deny God an opportunity to reveal His strength and power in our situation. He invites us to weakness. How much freedom is in that sentence? He invites you, welcomes you to be weak, encourages you to admit your weakness. For it is only, hear me, friends, it is only at our weakest that we can become our strongest. It's when you lay it all at the feet of Jesus and say, "I can't do this" that you experience true strength, healing, and freedom. I know. I heard you say, "But not me; you don't understand my life." Sister, that is a lack of faith. God is inviting us to trust Him with our weaknesses. The God of the universe is whispering in your other ear, "No, I've got this. I know you're weak, but I am strong." Let's rejoice in our weakness.
So, this may come as a complete shock to those who know me best, but I have a difficult time saying no. Don't roll your eyes. You do it, too. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure eye rolling is the first sign of conviction from the Holy Spirit. The next one is clearly denial, so don't go there. Perhaps this scenario seems familiar. You're in the middle of planning lessons while making dinner when the phone rings. Because you, like me, believe somehow the caller will see you're ignoring the call and take offense to your refusal to answer, you dig through your purse frantically searching for your phone, which is set on the "bark" ring tone thanks to children with a sense of humor and snatch it from the depths of the unknown just in time. Your husband hears this one-sided part of the conversation. "Saturday? Sure, I've got time to teach an extra class. Cookies? Homemade? Sure. Host a dinner afterwards? Of course, I'll just run the vacuum." In the meantime, both of your children can't live without immediate attention. Apparently, the blue crayon is AWOL and you're the only one who can find it. You hang up the phone, checking three times to make sure the call has ended, so the caller doesn't hear you and/or your husband and/or your children scream. You smile sheepishly, shrug your shoulders, and sigh, "I'll manage. It's no big deal," pull the burned rolls from the oven, disable the fire alarm, then go to your room and cry.
Not that I speak from experience, but the next thing you know you're driving down the highway suddenly bawling, turning up Adventures In Odyssey, so your children don't notice, drop them off at your husband's office, late, so you can make a doctor's appointment, late. Two hours later, you're covered in a thin papery-gown, freezing and sobbing, while the nurse pats your back and your doctor writes a prescription for anti-depressants. I've heard rumors of breakdowns like this happening, just saying....
And, here's the funny part, I....I mean, you, aren't fooling anyone. I have a friend who can take one look at me and sense immediately that I've over scheduled myself into a frenzy, however well-meaning my intentions. It seems my wild-eyed pacing, extreme frustration, and strange mumbling are dead giveaways that I clearly need a hand yet refuse to ask for one. I come by it honestly. I grew up in a family of self-sufficient do-it-yourselfers. I remember my mom pulling a week of all-nighters sewing burgundy taffeta, so my sister and I would have new dresses for a pageant. My sisters selflessly volunteer their time despite having a laundry list of demands at home. Like the mighty Titanic, we think we're unsinkable until we hit an iceberg and discover it's a little late.
We're not alone. I witness daily mom after mom buying into the lie that we can have it all that if we work harder or longer; we can single-handedly conquer whatever the day may throw at us. We believe the enemy when he whispers into our ear that our inability to accomplish every task on our to-do list is a sign of our incompetence and weakness. We refuse to admit that we're weak, frail, and human; that we're not supermom. Our inability to say no is the mask we wear to hide our weaknesses. We lose sight of grace and continue working our fingers to the bone for a salvation that can't be accomplished by works.
Recently, God opened my eyes anew to Paul's own breakdown moment. While he may not be supermom, he is the Mighty Mouse of Jesus followers. I realize most of us aren't sitting imprisoned for sharing our faith in Christ, but life can be tough, and in our vain human pride, we often make it even harder. Paul didn't hide behind his difficulty. "We do not want you to be uninformed brothers and sisters about the troubles we experienced...we were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves, but on God, who raises the dead...on Him we have set our hope that He will continue to deliver us, as you help by your prayers." 2 Cor 1: 8-11. Again, while none of us are necessarily facing death, we face our own trials, and what struck me about Paul's response is that he didn't pretend everything was okay. He's saying, straight up, we were scared for our lives.
Paul, super-apostle, man who'd encountered the risen Christ on the road to Damascus was stressed. He admitted it and pleaded for prayer. He reached out to his brothers and sisters in Christ, many facing the same thing he was, and asked for help through prayer. How many of us are in this mommying, serving, following Christ thing together? Why are we so stoic? Why are we pretending to be strong? Is it an attempt to prove we're better than everyone else? Girls, what do we gain by attempting to do it all and have it all? Why do we beat each other up, look down our nose at each other's choices and sit on a lonely throne of self-righteousness? Is a failure to admit weakness strength? No. Paul tells us so a little later in Corinthians. Are we denying each other an opportunity to minster and to pray and to share in each other's hardships? Isn't this one of our callings as sisters in Christ? Have I broken a record for most questions in one paragraph? We are called to support and love each other and by soldiering on in solitude, slowly crumbling under the pressures of life, building flimsy walls that block out the world from knowing how exhausted and overwhelmed we truly are, we deny each other our calling.
Paul also realized that God had allowed this to happen to increase his dependence on Jesus. He, later in the same book expresses a similar theme: But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Cor 12:9-10. Come again? Did you hear that? He delighted in his weakness. In his weakness lay his strength. Not only do we deny our friends and family the opportunity to fulfill their callings in Christ, we deny God an opportunity to reveal His strength and power in our situation. He invites us to weakness. How much freedom is in that sentence? He invites you, welcomes you to be weak, encourages you to admit your weakness. For it is only, hear me, friends, it is only at our weakest that we can become our strongest. It's when you lay it all at the feet of Jesus and say, "I can't do this" that you experience true strength, healing, and freedom. I know. I heard you say, "But not me; you don't understand my life." Sister, that is a lack of faith. God is inviting us to trust Him with our weaknesses. The God of the universe is whispering in your other ear, "No, I've got this. I know you're weak, but I am strong." Let's rejoice in our weakness.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Cold Feet
We've all heard that little voice; at least, I hope, we've all heard that little voice. You know the one that urges you to call the friend whose name suddenly jumps into your head, and now, you can't shake the feeling that she needs to talk to someone, but not just anyone, you. Sometimes the voice prods you to take a different running route where you discover a distraught mom outside of her broken-down car frantically pressing the power button on her cell phone, the one that she forgot to charge that morning. Moments that are beyond ordinary coincidences; moments when you know that voice was the sweet sound of the Holy Spirit.
I'm ashamed to admit that I've often ignored that voice or didn't hear it because I was too busy doing something important like checking out the most recent pictures of my friend's children on Facebook. Things that clearly need immediate attention. Lately, I've been prayerfully seeking to really hear and discern what the Holy Spirit has planned for me on a daily basis. Often, I'll sense Him prodding me toward a certain task, one where I stop and ask, "Really? Are you sure?" Usually, the task requires me to step out of my comfort zone and continue running for about 100 miles until I'm no longer in the same area code with said comfort zone. The message will come across loud and clear, and just to be sure, I'll pray about it. "This.....this is what I need to do, Lord?" "Yes." So, I'll pick up my Bible, open it, and pray, "If this is really from you Lord, allow me to receive confirmation."
Take today for instance; I felt the urge to call and offer my unrequested minimal assistance in a small mission opportunity. My first thought was but that person will think I've lost my ever-loving mind. What if they think I'm a weirdo? Apparently, I'm still working on getting over worrying about what people think of me, which is clearly a requirement for true Christian service.....and let's face it I am a weirdo. So I prayed to be sure, and the feeling didn't abate. To make doubly sure, I decided to read one more page in my bible study to see if I received any ground-breaking epiphany of confirmation, which I did, so much so that I got chills from head to toe and paused to put my hands in the air in a moment of praise. Then I decided to dry my hair and pray one more time.....just to be sure. Finally, I grabbed my cell phone and checked my email. Realizing it was now or never, I dialed with shaking fingers and a wildly beating heart, my acquaintance's number and discovered wonderful possibilities for true, meaningful mission work to be done in Haiti. I mean, seriously, what was I really afraid of? It was just so far beyond my comfort zone that I struggled to be obedient.
How many kingdom-building opportunities am I missing because basically I'm afraid of what people might think? Will they think I'm just trying to show how righteous I am? Will they think I'm crazy to think I could pull that off? Insecurity rears its ugly head every time I think I hear the Spirit speak. And, I want to shout to myself: it's not about you!!!! It's about Him! But, I'm trying to focus on listening more intently and obeying because by hearing and obeying, I am rewarded beyond measure with the opportunity to serve Christ in truly tangible ways. That trumps insecurity every time!
Speaking of missional living, perhaps I've mentioned this book I read by Jen Hatmaker called 7? (And just when you thought I was finally going to write a post shorter than 20 paragraphs....) If you like me have never considered what it really means when the tag in your sweater says Made in China, this book is truly eye-opening. One aspect that really spoke to me was the idea of becoming a more aware consumer, especially the concept of fair trade. There are a plethora of opportunities to shop in ways that allow you to participate in both kingdom-building and in empowering men and women across the world to build small businesses that benefit their villages. These artisans create beautiful goods and are offered a fair, sustainable wage for their products. Many of the websites that I will list in a moment are run by churches and Christian organizations that have partnered with villages in developing nations, and many of the profits from sales are used to provide care for orphans. So I encourage you to consider some of these sites when Christmas shopping and to learn more about fair trade and how partnering to build business relationships with artisans in these countries also provides an excellent opportunity to both spread and live the gospel.
http://livefashionable.com
http://www.cometogethertrading.com
http://www.redearthtradingco.com
http://www.furnacehillscoffee.com/index
http://preemptivelove.org
www.noondaycollection.com
http://goodnewsgoods.com
www.theopenarmshop.com
www.meadscorner.com
www.commonthreadz.com
www.Groobs.com
www.globalgirlfriend.com
www.3seams.com
http://www.ravenandlily.com
http://www.numanainc.com
http://www.pyxispath.com
www.tradeasone.com
www.thehungersite.org
www.funkyfishdesigns.com
www.bethejoy.com
I'm ashamed to admit that I've often ignored that voice or didn't hear it because I was too busy doing something important like checking out the most recent pictures of my friend's children on Facebook. Things that clearly need immediate attention. Lately, I've been prayerfully seeking to really hear and discern what the Holy Spirit has planned for me on a daily basis. Often, I'll sense Him prodding me toward a certain task, one where I stop and ask, "Really? Are you sure?" Usually, the task requires me to step out of my comfort zone and continue running for about 100 miles until I'm no longer in the same area code with said comfort zone. The message will come across loud and clear, and just to be sure, I'll pray about it. "This.....this is what I need to do, Lord?" "Yes." So, I'll pick up my Bible, open it, and pray, "If this is really from you Lord, allow me to receive confirmation."
Take today for instance; I felt the urge to call and offer my unrequested minimal assistance in a small mission opportunity. My first thought was but that person will think I've lost my ever-loving mind. What if they think I'm a weirdo? Apparently, I'm still working on getting over worrying about what people think of me, which is clearly a requirement for true Christian service.....and let's face it I am a weirdo. So I prayed to be sure, and the feeling didn't abate. To make doubly sure, I decided to read one more page in my bible study to see if I received any ground-breaking epiphany of confirmation, which I did, so much so that I got chills from head to toe and paused to put my hands in the air in a moment of praise. Then I decided to dry my hair and pray one more time.....just to be sure. Finally, I grabbed my cell phone and checked my email. Realizing it was now or never, I dialed with shaking fingers and a wildly beating heart, my acquaintance's number and discovered wonderful possibilities for true, meaningful mission work to be done in Haiti. I mean, seriously, what was I really afraid of? It was just so far beyond my comfort zone that I struggled to be obedient.
How many kingdom-building opportunities am I missing because basically I'm afraid of what people might think? Will they think I'm just trying to show how righteous I am? Will they think I'm crazy to think I could pull that off? Insecurity rears its ugly head every time I think I hear the Spirit speak. And, I want to shout to myself: it's not about you!!!! It's about Him! But, I'm trying to focus on listening more intently and obeying because by hearing and obeying, I am rewarded beyond measure with the opportunity to serve Christ in truly tangible ways. That trumps insecurity every time!
Speaking of missional living, perhaps I've mentioned this book I read by Jen Hatmaker called 7? (And just when you thought I was finally going to write a post shorter than 20 paragraphs....) If you like me have never considered what it really means when the tag in your sweater says Made in China, this book is truly eye-opening. One aspect that really spoke to me was the idea of becoming a more aware consumer, especially the concept of fair trade. There are a plethora of opportunities to shop in ways that allow you to participate in both kingdom-building and in empowering men and women across the world to build small businesses that benefit their villages. These artisans create beautiful goods and are offered a fair, sustainable wage for their products. Many of the websites that I will list in a moment are run by churches and Christian organizations that have partnered with villages in developing nations, and many of the profits from sales are used to provide care for orphans. So I encourage you to consider some of these sites when Christmas shopping and to learn more about fair trade and how partnering to build business relationships with artisans in these countries also provides an excellent opportunity to both spread and live the gospel.
http://livefashionable.com
http://www.cometogethertrading.com
http://www.redearthtradingco.com
http://www.furnacehillscoffee.com/index
http://preemptivelove.org
www.noondaycollection.com
http://goodnewsgoods.com
www.theopenarmshop.com
www.meadscorner.com
www.commonthreadz.com
www.Groobs.com
www.globalgirlfriend.com
www.3seams.com
http://www.ravenandlily.com
http://www.numanainc.com
http://www.pyxispath.com
www.tradeasone.com
www.thehungersite.org
www.funkyfishdesigns.com
www.bethejoy.com
Monday, April 18, 2011
Amazing Love
My Sunday school class has decided to examine a language that is at times as familiar and comfortable as a favorite pair of slippers and is at other times as uncomfortable and foreign as a faraway land. The language of love, more importantly what the Bible says about this language we all think we speak with fluency until we see the hurt in the eyes of a spouse or our child and suddenly we're struggling to make sense of how our expression could have been so misunderstood. And we see that maybe we're not speaking it so clearly, after all.
I have been blessed to be able to teach this unit of study and have loved researching love, more specifically, Agape. Not that I hold any authority on the subject or even know how to teach it adequately, but I do know I've experienced Agape and am excited to explore how to allow God to express His love through me more consistently. Following our first class, I sat in the choir loft listening to our church organist play "The Old Rugged Cross" yesterday and realized it was the first time I'd heard that song since I was a little girl sitting in the pew of Liberty Hill Baptist Church between my grandparents and mom. It was before the days of church nurseries or childcare, and my mom would write us notes or create goblets and swans out of gum wrappers to entertain us during the minister's spirited sermon. It dawned on me that this was Agape in action. My mom cared so much about our faith that she was willing to sit and entertain four children for over an hour just to set an example of the importance of worship.
Not that I was daydreaming during my own church service, but I couldn't keep my mind from contemplating how little we truly manage to practice an Agape kind of love, so I decided to post my notes from the Sunday school lesson yesterday in hopes that they might encourage someone who is finding someone in his/her life a little tough to love or who just needs to understand that our heavenly Father is always showing Agape, if we'll just receive it or to encourage moms who might grow weary of always setting that example for our children. Take heart; one day when you least expect it, they'll recall, appreciate, and share the lesson.
Speaking the Father's Language
“What is Love?” “What’s Love Got to Do With It?” “Love Stinks” “Love is Blind” “Love Hurts” “I’ve Got Your Love to Keep Me Warm”
Perhaps your thoughts on love mirror one of the above statements, or maybe you have a few more to add to the list. The quest to define love has led to wars both inside and outside the home. Wherever you currently stand, it’s hard to deny that as Christians, we are called to take off the blinders put on by society’s love expectations and to put on the Holy Spirit and love in a radical way. So, what exactly does that mean? What is Christian love supposed to look like? To truly understand what biblical love looks like, we need to examine the different Greek words for love.
When many of us think of love, we picture that floating-on-clouds-feet-not-touching-the-ground-butterflies-in-the-tummy-can’t-think-of-anyone-or-anything-else kind of love. That kind of love is Eros. The word actually means “’longing or desire’ and is a selfish love that asks what can I get for myself?” (53)
Another Greek word for love is Philos. Think brotherly love, as is Philadelphia, city of brotherly love (unless the Phillies just won the Series then it can be pretty ugly). It can also be defined as love among friends. In 1 Peter 3:8, we are called to “love the brethren.” The word used for love here is philadelphos, from the word philos (friend) and adelphos (brother). (57) In light of the season, interestingly. Phileo can also mean “kiss” and is the Greek word used when Judas betrays Christ with a kiss. In other cultures a kiss on the cheek denotes friendship.
We are going to focus on the other Greek word for love, which is Agape. Agape is “divine love that is propelled by the highest interest, where we are called to surrender to an act of God’s spirit which results in obedience.” (59) Agape is not an emotion; it is a response that can only be accomplished through the power of the Holy Spirit. We see Agape used in Christ’s commands for us to love; we see it in Christ describing his own love for us. Agape is the word used for love in the following verses. 1 John 4:16, 19- We know and believe the love God has for us. God is love, and he who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. We love because God first loved us. We are capable of responding in Agape because God first “Agaped.” How did He first demonstrate Agape. Well, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
John 3:16 states that For God so loved (agape) the world, that He gave his only son that whosover believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. We also find our command to Agape in Mark 12:31 “Which commandment is the greatest?” Jesus answered…..The Lord our God, the Lord is one; and you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength. The second is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ In these verses, each time you see the word love, Agape is the Greek word used.
And we see Agape in Galatians 5:22, the Fruit of the Spirit verses and that brings us to the heart of our discussion (get it, heart). When we receive Christ, the Holy Spirit takes up residence in us, and as a result we are told that we not only have great power, the power of the living God alive and at work in us, but we are also called to conform to Christ’s likeness through the power of this Spirit at work in us. That just means we are to die to the flesh, to the self, and grow in the Spirit, to allow the Spirit to work in us. The result of that working is the producing of fruit, the fruit of the Spirit, which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. This is what walking in the Spirit should look like in our lives. Note the fruit is singular; it is all of these qualities combined into one fruit, they must work together to be fruitful or productive, which is why I will be defining a few of those qualities that really seem to go hand-in-hand with achieving agape for those in our lives who often make us cringe.
A few notes here: love is agape. The word for patience, which will be important in our later discussion of how Christians are called to love, is Makrothumia. Makrothumia means “to be long suffering, self-restraint before proceeding to action, the quality of a person who is able to avenge himself and refrains from doing so.” (119) This differs from another biblical occurrence of patience, think Job, which is hupome. Hupome is where we get our word hope and means perseverance. Makrothumia involves patience with people, while hupome involves patience with circumstances. We’ll definitely see the difference in our discussion.
Now, back to Agape. Question, when you think of love and the Bible, what verses immediately come to mind? Think weddings, think weddings, think weddings. Did you say 1 Corinthians 13? That is what I was hoping would come to mind! This is often referred to as the love chapter. I am going to challenge you to see it in new light. This verse tells us what love (agape) is and what love isn’t. It also can be seen as qualities, I believe of God, because as we learned in 1 John 14:19 God is Agape.
WHAT LOVE IS
Patient
Kind
Rejoices in Truth
Keeps no record of Wrongs
Protects
Trusts
Hopes
Perseveres
WHAT LOVE IS NOT
Boastful
Jealous
Proud
Rude
Self-Seeking
Easily Angered
Delight in Evil
Failure
First of all, understand, 1 Corinthians 13 isn’t written to married couples. It is written to Christians. We are not just called to love our spouses in this manner; we are called to love our enemies in this manner. Yes, in Matthew 5:44, where it says to love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, the word agape is used there, too! So, this is written to Christians who are commanded to Agape all as Christ Agaped us!
Allow me to quickly make a few comments on the specifics of some of the words in this list. Here patient is makrothumia. Remember our definition of makrothumia??? Enough said. We are called to practice makrothumia.
Kind is from the Greek word chresteuomai which means to show oneself useful.
Pride. Hmmmm. I believe this is the one that most prevents us from loving as we are called to do so. Again, my thoughts, but let’s examine how pride can ruin a relationship. “You just don’t know him.” “You can’t possibly expect me to see things as she does.” “It’s not me; you just spend ten minutes with her, you’ll see.” I am right; you are wrong. I refuse to see that it might be me and even if it isn’t….hmm….you get the picture. We are called to not be proud, to…gulp….swallow our pride, our ego, and humble ourselves in love. Our King washed the feet of his disciples, which I imagine is the modern day equivalent of cleaning their toilet, perhaps. For it to be such an example of humility, it must have been a task that most would try to avoid, yet he performed it in love. The Son of God came to serve in humility. For more on what pride can do, check out Psalm 10:4- in their pride, the wicked do not seek God. How about 2 Chronicles 26:16- we are told outright pride led to King Uzziah’s downfall. Proverbs 11:2 tells us pride brings disgrace, humility wisdom. In Daniel we learn King Belshazzar was stripped of his glory and throne due to pride, he fell into the hands of the Babylonians when he failed to heed the writing on the wall. Pride, an unwillingness to let go of our own notions of how it should be, an unwillingness to yield. (my own definition.)
Okay, now that I’ve revealed that pride in relationships is something I struggle with…..I’m done with my sermon to self. Love does not seek self. Does not seek self. Christ clearly did not seek self at any point of his earthly ministry. He sought our best interest and still does. Isn’t so much of our inability to not show agape rooted in our on self-interest, in our, my, desire to stand up and say, “Look at me. Look at what I can do! Me! Please see and affirm me!” In our desire for affirmation, to feel important, to be somebody, we step on others in the climb upward. Love, true agape, isn’t about me. It’s about you; it’s about Him!
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth and it always protects. The Greek word for protect is stego and it means “to cover in silence.” (65) I love the image Beth Moore painted of this concept in her study Living Beyond Yourself. Love “does not expose the faults of others. When we exercise agape toward an individual no matter how well we know him or her, we would not expose his or her faults to others (even if they “deserve” it- my note). It is the word picture of covering an individual with such a cloak of love that the fault cannot be seen.” (p. 65) What an image! What if we practiced that in our marriages and friendships and just in our relationships in general? Takes humility, doesn’t it.
“Agape is divine love that originates in the heart of God….expressed through us to others” (66) Hopefully, through understanding the concepts from Love Languages in the next few weeks, we can be more cognizant of our own expression of agape and how to be sure that is the kind of love we express in all of our relationships. I challenge each of us to Agape and am willing to step out on a limb and say it’ll change your life, Christ will change your life when you allow Him to show you how to love!
Sources: Blue Letter Bible online and Living Beyond Yourself: Exploring the Fruit of the Spirit Beth Moore
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