Going Grain Free

After eating a Paleo diet for six months, I've decided it's time for my children to join me.  My husband has gone gluten free, which is a start.  The next few months the blog will be dedicated to all types of writing, as usual, but I also plan to track our eating adventures pretty closely.  I will also dedicate a series of posts to why I decided to pursue grain-free living and condense the immense amount of research I've conducted into shorter posts.  And, while I don't believe there is one-size-fits all to much of anything in life, especially clothing, I understand different types of eating work for different individuals.  After extensive research and real-life experience, this is what I believe best fits my family, and I'm simply sharing the knowledge I've gained and the experiences we are encountering with you.

So, grain-free....that means no beloved goldfish, pasta, bread, quesadillas, cakes, cookies, pies, and the list seems endless.  Why would anyone give up soft, chewy, delectable rolls?  Aren't grains government-approved and endorsed as the crux of the American diet?  There are so many questions to cover that it seems overwhelming, which is why this will require several posts.  So first things first, why grain free?

I gave up bread and most grains almost two years ago and have never looked back.  Bread doesn't even appeal to me anymore now that I've read the science behind what excessive carbohydrates can do to your body.  I've never felt better.  My skin's never looked better....well....pre-puberty but whose didn't?  So part of the reason I've decided to take my children on this journey with me are the results I've seen in my own health markers such as energy level, sleep pattern, mood, weight, and many others.

I'd quickly like to address the food pyramid side of this, too.  It would be nice to think that the government created the food pyramid in a nice little, sound, scientific bubble, but that's simply not true.  The government creates no legislation or policy in a vacuum.  Not to rain on anyone's parade, but a lot of interest groups contributed to the contents of the current and previous food pyramids: the dairy industry, meat industry, grain industry, pharmaceutical industry, and all of these industries, though, we'd like to think they have our best interests at heart, they actually have a different bottom-line in mind, their own.  I'm a conservative, free-market, capitalist-loving girl, but I'm not blind to the influences that business and other interest groups (conservative and liberal) have on governmental policy.  If you'd like to learn more on how the food pyramid was decided or would like to learn more about food policy, Death By Food Pyramid, The Calorie Myth, and Fast Food Nation, among I'm sure many others, are good sources.  Be warned, though, you'll never look at a McDonald's combo the same.

I hear the grumblings.  Who do I think I am to try and completely overhaul the way my readers think about the Standard American Diet?  I'll admit that I am no expert, but in the past year, I have read over 30 books on nutrition.  Some were written by cardiologists, some by neurosurgeons with degrees in nutrition, as well, some were written by biologists, some by journalists, and some by nutritionists.  Please know, these books were not all written from a pro-Paleo perspective.  Most of the research I did was to prove that grain-free must be a scam.  Please don't tell me life without pasta is good for me.  Mama Mia!!  It's like the atheist who sets out to disprove the Bible and ends up an ardent follower of Christ.  The harder I tried the more the evidence I discovered that our American diet full of refined grains, refined sugar, and high omega-6 vegetable oils is most likely the culprit in our U.S. obesity/disease epidemic.  In fact, most research agrees that some version of the basic Mediterranean or Paleo diet offer the best health results.  The diets have in common that they focus on vegetables, fish, meat, healthy oils, and very few to no refined grains, refined sugar, and hydrogenated oils.

My entire nutritional perspective has been turned on its head.  For example, saturated fat and cholesterol aren't the enemy.  In fact, fat, the right kind, and cholesterol are good.  Pick your chin up off the floor, I'm serious.  For years and years, the belief was that bread made you fat then we were told to put down the steak, eschew the butter, and pick up a box of refined, vitamin-fortified carb-loaded Special K with orange juice.  Ancel Keys is to thank for the shift in perspective.  In the 1950s he studied diets and heart disease in 22 countries where he found that six of the 22 countries showed a link between dietary fat and heart disease.  He garnered a great deal of press, including a Time magazine cover story.  (Interestingly 64 years later, in 2014 Time ran a retraction of sorts, which stated "We were wrong about saturated fat.")  Keys selectively picked data that supported his hypothesis and in turn, transformed the way a society thought about nutrition and heart disease.  He adamantly believed that fat contributed to heat disease.  But, when all 22 countries were examined, there turned out to be no relationship between fat intake and heart disease death.  Other scientists taking the same data could have selectively selected six other countries and proven that eating more fat decreases the risk of dying from heart disease (Bailor).

Even the American Medical Association declared, "The anti-fat, anti-cholesterol fad is not just foolish and futile....it also carries some risk."  In fact, there is an alarming correlation between the government's recommendation to consume more grains and the increase in diabetes and obesity rates in the United States  Regardless, fat's new role as public enemy number one continued culminating in a government recommendation for low-fat, high starch diets (The Calorie Myth, Bailor).  Cholesterol has also been touted as a heart killer but recent studies are disproving this, as well.  In fact, cholesterol is critical to normal brain function.

Two very well-respected studies are helping to shed light on the fat myth.  The Nurse's Health Study has tracked the dietary habits of 90,000 nurses over twenty years.  It has shown no statistically significant association between total fat or cholesterol intake and heart disease.  The Framingham Heart Study has also shown a link between LOW cholesterol intake and an increased risk of dementia.  In fact, those who had the highest cholesterol levels scored higher on cognitive tests than those with lower levels (Perlmutter, 34).  Scientist are discovering that it is actually inflammation not cholesterol that is the real culprit behind heart disease (more on this in later posts.)

So, exactly what's so bad about too many carbs and about the wrong carbs.  Well, here's the short, I'm not a scientist version.  Excess body fat is a direct reflection of the amount of insulin produced in the diet, combined with a genetic predisposition to store fat.  Moderate insulin is good, too much is not so good.  Insulin delivers nutrients to the cells.  When insulin levels are elevated we accumulate fat in our fat tissue; when these levels fall, fat is used for fuel.  Insulin levels are mostly determined by the carbohydrates we eat.  According to George Cahill, former professor of medicine at Harvard Medical School, "Carbohydrate is driving insulin is driving fat" (Taubes, 231).  When your liver and muscles become filled with glycogen, any glucose remaining in the bloodstream that isn't used by your brain or muscles gets converted into triglycerides and sent to fat cells for storage.  When blood insulin levels are high, insulin signals the fat cells to hold on to fat and not release it for energy (Sisson, 73).  So, obesity is a hormonal imbalance rather than one of too many calories in, too few out.  Our bodies are intricate chemistry labs not algebraic equations.  The "stimulating of insulin secretion is caused by eating easily digestible, carbohydrate-rich foods:  refined carbohydrates, including flour and cereal grains, starchy vegetables, and sugars, like sucrose and high-fructose corn syrup.  Those carbohydrates literally make us fat, and by driving us to accumulate fat, they make us hungrier and they make us sedentary" (Taubes, 243).

Notice, I didn't say all carbohydrates cause this.  High quality, high-fiber carbs found in vegetables do not contribute to this phenomenon.  Low-carb mostly means fewer or no grains and replacing those with vegetables and seasonal fruits, plus adding protein from grass-fed beef and pork and wild-caught seafood, and by replacing hydrogenated vegetable oils, including canola, with coconut and olive oil.

So, this is the science-y part condensed from thirty books into a blog post.  I haven't covered specific effects of grains like gluten in this post, though.  I'm saving that for later.  My recent experience with a complete eating overhaul coupled with the extensive scientific research, including a host of well-respected researchers from Harvard, John Hopkins, etc., has led me to make the decision to change the way my family eats, too.

I used to think that what I ate didn't really affect me that much.  Because we often don't notice negative health effects until they sneak up on us years later, we often don't make the connection between what we eat today and our health in ten years, but I am convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt, that it does matter.  My breakfast this morning not only affects my mood in three hours, it also impacts my health in one year.  There is a direct connection between what goes into my mouth and my health.  In fact, weight control is 80 percent diet and just 20 percent exercise.  Eighty percent!!  So, I've broken it to my kids that we are ditching the goldfish and chex mix and replacing them with beef jerky, fresh berries, and cheese slices.  Too many studies have linked diet to ADHD, mood, inability to focus, and overall health for me to sit quietly by and allow my children to continue down the road of the Standard American Diet.  I know I'm going to be known as the crazy homeschooling, Paleo momma, but I don't care.  I'm ready to endure the whining until my little ones also start to realize the benefits of healthier, cleaner eating., and I have no problem with the stares I receive when I say I no longer eat bread. In fact, after two years, I've grown quite accustomed to the "bless her" head shake.  So, stay tuned to our adventure.  Coming soon, I'll share my research on gluten, eating local, the importance of choosing grass-fed animals, etc.  Plus, I'll share recipe disasters and successes, like my recent Coconut Cream Pie with a divine almond flour crust.  I look forward to sharing this journey to a healthier family with you.


List of books I've read (but not all) which include sources for this article:


The Great Cholesterol Myth Jonny Bowden
Brain Maker David Perlmutter
Why We Get Fat Gary Taubes
The Primal Blueprint Gary Sisson
The Calorie Myth Jonathan Bailor
Wheat Belly William Davis
Death By Food Pyramid:  How Shoddy Science, Sketchy Politics, and Shaky Special Interests Have Ruined Our Health Denise Minger  (Come on, the title of this alone makes it worth the read:)
Eat Like a Dinosaur Stacy Toth
Real Life Paleo Stacy Toth
Against All Grain Danielle Walker
The Homegrown Paleo Diana Rodgers
The Paleo Diet Loren Cordain
Good Calories, Bad Calories Gary Taubes
The Paleo Solution Robb Wolf
Perfect Health Diet Pail Jaminet
The Paleo Manifesto John Durant
Grain Brain David Perlmutter
It Starts With Food Dallas and Melissa Hartwig

Why Is It So Hard to Say No?

In the past week I've had separate conversations with two dear friends that centered around our inability to say no to basically anyone who requests our help.  We laughed about how we have no idea how to set boundaries or create margin in our lives then our laughter dissolved into silent tears of frustration.  Ok, maybe that was just me.  I noticed that what my friends and I share are careers that involve helping children, and seriously, it is very difficult to decline a request to help a child, but we also all genuinely love others and enjoy helping, yet each of us realizes that our failure to say no is costing us our well-being and in some small ways, our sanity.

I left my conversations wondering what it is about me that refuses to utter the word no when I desperately need to say it, and I came up with a list, which is quite an accomplishment since I fail to ever create one for the grocery.  I can't imagine that I'm alone, so I decided to share my list, a sort of kindred spirit expressing what I know many of us would like to say.  Because, frankly, I think this is a girl thing.  I think our taking on incessant requests goes to the heart of who we are as women, and girls, I think we need to realize that "no" is not a four-letter word.  So, here's why I can't say no:

1.  I'm afraid of what other people will think of me.

Yes, this one tops the list.  Who wants to be considered selfish, mean, unkind, thoughtless?  Each time I weigh wether or not to accept a request, I run through a litany of what the person will think of me if I say no.  I KNOW.  Shallow, weird, pathetic of me, but I'm aware of the problem.  I want people to like me, to think I'm nice, kind, accommodating, superwoman.....  It's easy to tell me to not worry about what others will think, but putting that into practice is difficult for me.

2.  I'm afraid if I say no once or twice, people will stop asking me.

I enjoy helping others; I really do, but there are times I really cannot physically or mentally handle another demand on my time.  If I say no, I fear that I won't be asked to be part of something that can really help someone else, and that saddens me.

3.  Sometimes my friends and family need me, and I really love my friends and family and don't want to let them down.  If my life is filled with 60 hour work weeks that leaves me no time to assist the people I love. 

4.  I'm afraid I'll disappoint someone, hurt her feelings, put her in a precarious situation.

5.  I'm afraid if I turn away clients my phone will stop ringing, and I love and need my job.

I've chosen a career path that involves helping others.  I chose it deliberately for that purpose.  I love teaching; few things bring me greater joy than seeing a child finally grasp a concept.  If I start saying no to new students, I fear word will get out and people will stop calling.

6.  I feel selfish and guilty every time I turn someone who needs me away.  It's as if I am personally responsible for his/her success and well-being. 

So there they are.  The top six reasons I have trouble saying no....but I need to learn to say no.  I've been putting in almost 60 hour work weeks.  Perhaps not physically at the office, but my jobs also require planning, research, grading, returning calls, etc.  Like all of us, I also have church and volunteer commitments, and my children participate in sports.  I also homeschool my children, and oh, yes, I'm married.  A nagging foot injury that's been slow to heal has added doctors' visits and physical therapy to a schedule that's already busting at the seams.  And you know what, I am just like every other mom in this country.  I'm not unique or special in my struggle.  This is our shared story of overcommitment which leaves us overwhelmed and overly-spent.  Why do we continue to do this to ourselves, girls?  Why?  It's time to stop, so in addition to my previous list, I've come up with a list of reasons we need to stop.

1.  Every time we say yes to someone else, we say no to our own families.

I am my children's mommy first.  They need me to be present, to be fully there with them and not distracted, annoyed, stressed, and overwhelmed.  My sweet little ones are not an item to be checked off the daily to-do list.  They are precious treasures entrusted to me by a loving God who expects me to reflect His love to them every day.  They and their father are my most important earthly priority and it is high-time I lived that truth.  

2.  When we refuse to say no, we might be robbing someone else the joy of saying yes.

I began reading a book titled The Best Yes about a year ago.  Perhaps, I should finish it.....but from what I managed to read, I gathered the basic premise is that we should be picky about our yeses.  Not that we should turn down everything and sit at home and do nothing, but that we should carefully consider when to accept a request and when to graciously say no.  The author made a point that resonated which was sometimes we rob the "right" person of the job.  It isn't our responsibility to take on everything and by doing so, perhaps we are preventing someone from serving God in a particular capacity that's meant for that person.  We accept the job grudgingly and resent the person who asked. What if there's someone eager and willing and excited about helping out in that specific way.  Your no may open the door to someone else's ideal yes.

3.  When we take on too many responsibilities, it is impossible to perform any of them to our best ability, so we end up giving less than our best.  At some point we are going to drop the ball.

I can perform a few tasks well.  When I'm tutoring thirty students a week, teaching six classes, and writing five articles, I'm giving my best to none of those, and ultimately, I let someone down.  The child who needs my all receives a distracted tutor who can't stop yawning, much less focus on complicated Algebra.  I wake up every morning in a cold sweat wondering what I forgot to do the day before or what I'm forgetting to do that day.  It's awesome.  Really, love living this way.

4.  We are hurting our health, and if we don't take care of ourselves, it is absurd to think we can take care of someone else.  

Our health and sanity matter.  My middle sister quietly takes on tasks and stoically performs each one, never complaining.  That gene skipped me.  I'm outspoken, verbal, and wear my heart on my sleeve.  Both of us are hurting our health each time we add a new, often unnecessary stressor to our day.  We each have physical manifestations of our inner struggles with stress.  Lately, I've find myself wavering between wanting to cry.....I mean sob like a baby.....and wanting to throw a tantrum....full-on lying in the floor, kicking, screaming.  I imagine it would take place in the kitchen, where my children's usually take place.  I'd kick the cabinet open and closed, maybe rattle a pot or pan.  If the foot injury would heal, much of this could be solved with a good run, but the point is it affects my health and my mood.  Depression and anxiety seep in to an already stressful workload,  my head aches, and I'm not my best.  I'm my worst, and that's not good for anyone.  

5.  When we say yes to everything, it leaves no time to say yes to the things we really want to do.   Plus, it sets a poor example for our own children to see us relentlessly occupying our days with nothing but obligations.

I've recently begun to write, not just for fun, but also for employment.  It's a dream of mine to write, and I've finally been given an opportunity to perhaps pursue it more seriously, but there's rarely time.  My children need to see me pursuing big dreams to give them the courage to pursue their own.  I need to take the time to nurture hobbies to share gifts that I cultivated in my downtime.  If I never have downtime then I don't have time to chase non-work related dreams and goals.  I need to set a better example of work-family-recreational balance in my life for my own children, so they don't
grow into careworn adults whose lives are filled with stress and commitments.  

6.  Saying no doesn't mean that we love the person any less or that we don't grasp the gravity of her need.

7.  Our inability to say no reveals a lack of trust in God.

This last one hits me between the eyes.  When I take on everything, as if the survival of the world depends on me, I'm telling God, either I don't need you or I don't trust you to handle it.  I say yes because there can't possibly be anyone else to handle the task.  How preposterous is that?  I'm not trusting God to provide for me or for the person who needs help.  Sometimes, I am the provision but not always.  There are times I take on a new student when I know my schedule can't handle it, when I know it puts my husband in a bind, and frustrates my children because I'm afraid we might one day need the income.  Rather than follow my gut and decline, I say no to God, no to trusting in His provision, and foolishly try to control every situation on my own.  If I truly trusted God, I'd trust His divine will, His provision, His leading, and graciously say no, but I don't.  At the crux of it all is a faith issue, a heart issue that reveals a lack of faith.  Sometimes, friends, saying no to others, even those we love, is saying yes to God.  

This struggle is real for me, and I know it is real for the countless number of friends I have who are flustered, frazzled, and haggard, who collapse into bed at night wondering if this is it.  Is life meant to be this overwhelming all the time?  Are we as moms never meant to enjoy the little things, to relish in the little moments, to cherish small snippets of quiet solitude?  I don't believe God meant for it to be this way.  He isn't harried, rushed, or frantic.  Look at the slow, deliberate, un-rushed patterns in nature.  God is never in a frenetic hurry.  So, I'm looking to the Creator who incorporated Sabbath rest into His own schedule.  

This summer I'm saying no.  I even have an accountability partner, my youngest sister, who I  texted last night a tirade of tiredness.  I usually text her in those moments of coming apart because she allows me to say anything I want and promises to not have me committed.  We agreed to hold each other accountable in this fight.  So, this summer, I'm doing what I love, not in a selfish-all-about-me way but in a restorative way that renews me to better serve in the fall.  I'm recharging my spirit and reprioritizing my no's and yeses, so I can serve where I truly believe God wants me.  I'm spending time with my husband and children and family and friends.  I'm writing, which I love.  I'm gardening.  I'm improving my home.  I'm choosing to live at a pace I can manage.  I'm choosing to help those who really, really need me.  And if I survive this quiet, sacred pace this summer, I may even continue it in the fall.  I hope you'll join me.....