Food Fight

A typical mealtime conversation in my household:

"Want some cantaloupe, sweetie?"

"No, no loop."

"How about some yummy apple?"

"No!" Arms folded, nose scrunched in disgust.

"Pumpkin, it's apple. I can't name a soul that doesn't like an apple."

"No appuh, mommy." Apple now flies to the floor landing precariously on the cantaloupe already in the floor. It totters before falling onto the hardwoods. My dining room now resembles the aftermath of a middle school food-fight.

My hands fly up in surrender. "Fine, but one day you're going to grow tired of pancakes, peas, and strawberries."

Repeat above sequence three times per day, seven days a week.

It wasn't supposed to be this way. The experts said it would be different, and I believed them. While pregnant, I was adventurous, just as I was told to be by my ob-gyn. I ate salmon, black beans, squash, mangoes, whole grains, spinach. I was the bungee jumper of adventurous eating. And, the adventure continued right into nursing. My milk was spiked with all the flavors I hoped A's palate would someday relish with glee. Apparently, the exposure to all those flavors would make A an adventurous eater, as well.

Even in the baby food stage, A happily gobbled such appetizing combinations as turkey, brown rice, and sweet potatoes with spinach. A concoction that looked just as yummy as it sounds. No one ate what appeared to be regurgitated pea slime with rice lumps as voraciously as my girl. So, where did I go wrong? When did bananas lose their appeal? When did mashed potatoes become evil? Even toddler staples like macaroni and cheese and peanut butter and jelly are met with the same vigorous head shake followed by the death march to the floor.

I've tried everything, yet A insists on strawberries, cheese quesadillas, peas & carrots, chicken nuggets, and pancakes meal-in and meal-out. Okay, I've tried everything short of simply forcing her to eat whatever I cook. I've bought the "puree" cookbooks that suggest putting spinach, cauliflower, or carrot puree in brownies or in pasta sauce. Ever eaten those brownies? They taste like chocolate covered spinach. I've tried reading books on getting picky eaters to eat. They recommend giving your child what you cook and if she doesn't like it, tough luck, missy. Well, I've been making separate A meals for so long now, I don't really feel up for the epic battle that transition would bring on. Plus, she's already so thin. So what's a mom to do? Will A forever live on the unhealthy fare she insists on eating now?

I've almost given up hope, but I did notice recently that A really likes whipped cream. So much that I think she put it on her carrots last night. Perhaps, if I put whipped cream on all of her food, she'd eat it. Doesn't whipped cream have calcium? Hmmm....I'll let you know how that goes. I just hope she's this picky when it comes to boys.