Just now, as I was attempting to change the battery in my daughter's favorite toy, I realized that Hasbro or Mattel or any of the other hundreds of toy companies should be placed in charge of national security. I also think they should revise the directions for changing the batteries in the singing Elmo book to as follows:
Step 1- Locate screwdriver so tiny that it must only exist in the imaginary world in which my daughter plays.
Step 2- Find batteries so small that if swallowed they would choke only Thumbellina.
Step 3- Try to fit impossibly small screwdriver into impossibly small screw and attempt to carefully twist out the screw without losing it for eternity somewhere on the kitchen floor.
Step 4- Insert new batteries without same dilemma occuring as in step 3.
Step 5- Do all of this with toddler tugging on your leg crying desperately for her favorite book.
Step 6- Relish child's joy. The smile on her adorable face when she discovers that after three weeks her favorite toy is again working because mommy finally remembered to buy AAA batteries makes steps 1-5 worth every minute! What a blessing.
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